Next Week's Movies

Cyrus: I am semi-excited for this movie, has the potential to be a twisted black comedy, and hopefully take Jonah Hill out of his Apatow safe zone into creepier territory. Plus Marisa Tomei and John C Reilly. Expectancy Level: 7/10

The Runaways: I wonder what fans of the punkish group The Runaways thought of this movie casting two actresses from twilight in the lead roles. Must be delighted. But cruel asides aside, both Stewart and Fanning are good actresses in theory and this might be a chance for them to show it. Plus Michael Shannon. Expectancy Level: 6/10

Going The Distance: Hmm. romantic comedy in 2010 instantly makes me jump back in fear, but this one's got Drew Barrymore and Justin Long and is supposed to be at least OK. Its got to be at least OK. I don't know what will become of me if its not. Plus Charlie Day! Fuck Yeah. Expectancy Level: 5/10

Resident Evil: Afterlife: Fuck you movie, making me double colon. That shit looks ridiculous. Colon afterlife colon indeed. Paul ' I'm not even the best director with my own name' Anderson returns to the helm, and this time its in 3D. I can't believe there's been five Resident Evil movies. Plus, erm Ali Larter? Expectancy Level: 3/10

Tamara Drewe: This film had the worst trailer of anything I've ever seen I think, so I go in with an untameable vengeance. Shit gonna get destroyed. And not just because its going to be shit, but because fuck it. Plus Stephen Frears, Expectancy Level: 3/10