Thursday, 18 March 2010

REVIEW: The Bounty Hunter

Rather then review the Bounty Hunter in a manner conventional, I have decided to be extra smug/awesome and review this profoundly terrible movie through the depiction your emotional responses funnelled through the genius that is Gerard Butler . You know, to bring some light into this dark world.

In you're typical pre-movie state of awesomeness:

After The First thirty seconds and you realize what you're about to go through:

Once Gerard Butler starts trying be funny:

On whether Jennifer Aniston's cinematic unapproachability is a result of her life or her plastic surgery:

On Jason Sudeikis' offensively retarded stalker character:

On how the movie manages to unashamedly ogle Jennifer Aniston at all times:

On the standard of the dialogue, and the prospect of it making you want to run screaming back to the ugly truth:

On the movie's patronising attempts to show some actual humanity:

On the horribly embarrassing Cupid's cabin scene which makes you want to die:

On realizing this movie is almost over:

And if you came with your girlfriend, the realization that she owes you big:

And if you came alone, that the joke is really on you:

Rating: 3/10

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